How to Stop Hating the Subjunctive

Getting to Grips with the Subjunctive

Like most people learning French, I’ve had a rocky relationship with the subjunctive, and chances are you’ll identify with at least a few of these frustrations:

• English speakers lack an obvious point of reference, as the English subjunctive isn’t easily recognisable, even when it’s used.

• The French usage rules feel more like riddles.

• The conjugations are irregular and hard to memorise.

• It sounds formal and intimidating (even though formality has no bearing on its usage).

• And to top it all off, even native speakers slip up with it occasionally.

You’re probably familiar with the guidance that the subjunctive should be used to express what is subjective. But even this explanation seems too abstract and open to interpretation. It feels like I’m trying to draw the line between purple and blue.

I’ll reluctantly admit that it took me far longer than I’d like to crack the code. But once the penny dropped, things began to fall into place, and today I use the subjunctive naturally and confidently. Here, I’m going to share the insight that helped me get there.

The Many Stages of Subjunctive Struggle

I went through all the usual steps:

• First, I tried memorising the verbs that take the subjunctive. This was more difficult than I expected, especially since the same verb might follow different rules depending on whether the sentence is affirmative or negative.

  
  

• Then I tried to decipher the broader rules, but they often felt inconsistent or contradictory. Especially since many learning resources jumble verbs across themes, which makes spotting patterns even harder.

  
  

• Eventually, I told myself I’d just have to develop a feel for it over time by listening intently, experimenting with its use, and accepting that I’d make a lot of mistakes.

  
  

• And of course, there was always the classic avoidance tactic: finding a sneaky way to 'cheat the system'. Here are some of my favourites:

  
  

  • Certain expressions make it quite easy to dodge the difficulty.

    Where using que leads you into the thicket of the subjunctive, choosing de gives you a clear path to the infinitive - as in avant de venir instead of avant que tu viennes. A neat shift that spares you the mental gymnastics.

    
    

  • Rewording the sentence with impersonal phrasing is another way to sidestep the subjunctive altogether.

    For example Il faut venir tôt instead of Il faut que tu viennes tôt.

    
    

  • Strategically choosing an "easy" verb where the imperative and the subjunctive look and sound the same (typically with regular -er verbs like donner).

    For example J’apprécie que tu donnes un coup de main à ta sœur.

    This way, you don’t even need to know whether you're using the subjunctive because it’s grammatically correct either way!

🎁 Struggling to make sense of the subjunctive?

I’ve created a free, easy-reference guide with logically grouped triggers, register notes, and tips for usage. Find out how to get it at the end of the article.

The Breakthrough: Understanding Mood

So why is it so tricky to get a feel for the subjunctive? A big part of the problem lies in how we’re taught verbs in the first place.

Most of the materials I used presented verb tables by tense (past, present, future, conditional, etc.) as if they're all on the same level. The subjunctive often gets lumped in as just another tense.

But here’s the key: the subjunctive isn’t a tense. It’s a mood (or a mode in French).

Moods are a level above tenses. They tell you something about the speaker’s attitude towards the action being described, whether it’s a fact, a desire, a command, or a possibility.

Here are the four moods used in French:

• Indicative – for stating certainty or things assumed to be true

• Conditional – for expressing hypothetical or dependent scenarios

• Imperative – for giving commands or instructions

• Subjunctive – for expressing doubt, emotion, desire, uncertainty, or subjectivity

The Theatre Metaphor

To visualise this, imagine a theatre stage where a play is taking place:

• The lighting represents the mood. You can assign colours to help interpret the emotional energy of the scene:

  
  

  • A bold blue signals the indicative — it’s sure of itself and grounded in fact.

  • A muted green suggests the conditional — evoking possibilities that depend on something else.

  • The imperative blazes in a raging red, issuing commands with urgency and force.

  • And the subjunctive is lit by an amber yellow — warm and expressive, bathing the scene in emotion, doubt, and possibility.

    
    

• Imagine how the actor’s tone and body language would shift depending on the lighting colour. The entire scene takes on a different emotional charge.

  
  

• Now picture the position of the actors on stage reflecting the tense:

  • Stage left is the past

  • Centre stage is the present

  • Stage right is the future

    
    

• Finally comes the script, shaped by the subject and verb, that determines who is being spoken about and what’s being said.

  
  

Each scene, then, combines all three elements: Lighting (mood) + Position (tense) + Script (conjugation).

Understand those, and suddenly the whole play makes sense.

So When Do You Use It?

For me, the déclic was realising that using the subjunctive isn’t about obeying abstract grammar rules, and it’s definitely not about tenses. It’s about recognising tone, or what I think of as vibes.

It’s the colour of the scene.

If I’m stating something that feels concrete or certain, I probably need the indicative:

Il est vrai que tu as raison. (It’s true that you’re right.)

But if I’m expressing desire, doubt, emotion or uncertainty, then I know I’m likely in subjunctive territory:

Je doute que ce soit vrai. (I doubt that’s true)

Je veux que tu viennes. (I want you to come)

Je suis content que tu sois là. (I’m glad you’re here)

As you’d expect in French, there are exceptions! The one that continues to baffle me is espérer (to hope). Even though it clearly expresses a desire, it typically takes the indicative.

Luckily, this is such a commonly used verb that you’ll naturally acquire the habit of using the indicative quite quickly.

Damned if you do, damned if you don’t!

Be careful copying native speakers. They sometimes lay traps for the unsuspecting apprentice, not out of malice, but due to their own unfamiliarity with (or casual disregard for) grammar rules. You'll occasionally hear the subjunctive in places where it technically doesn’t belong.

A classic example is using the subjunctive following après que (meaning after). It should take the indicative, because what happens after an event is generally considered certain, but you’ll often hear the subjunctive instead.

For example, if you wanted to say something like I left after he arrived, then Je suis parti après qu’il est arrivé is correct but you're just as likely to hear Je suis parti après qu’il soit arrivé.

This is probably because avant que (before) does take the subjunctive, and the two get muddled.

This creates an odd kind of linguistic dilemma: follow the rule and risk sounding unpolished, or mimic common usage even though you know it’s technically wrong.

And whichever path you choose, there's naturally a good chance that the person you’re speaking to will wince, convinced it should have been the other one!

Pro Tips

• While the subjunctive officially has four tenses, in reality you’ll only need to use two: present and past. The others are practically extinct.

Present (also commonly used to express a desire for something happening in the future): Je veux qu’il vienne. (I want him to come.)

Past: Je doute qu’elle ait compris. (I doubt that she understood.)

An easy way to remember this is to think about how you’ll only ever see the actor illuminated with that warm orange hue either on the left or in the middle of the stage.

• You never start a sentence with the subjunctive. It almost always appears after a trigger word or phrase, often following que.

  (Avant que tu sois là)

  
  

• You always need two different subjects if you’re using the subjunctive. If both clauses of the sentence have the same subject, use the infinitive instead:

Je veux aller au cinéma (correct)

Je veux que j’aille au cinéma (incorrect)

• Music is often full of emotional language, so one of the best ways to tune your ear to the subjunctive is by listening to French songs and noticing where it appears.

Final Thoughts

Despite its reputation, the subjunctive isn’t as scary as it seems.

Using it correctly is one of the fastest ways to sound like you’ve mastered French, precisely because most people struggle!

You don’t need to get it perfect every time. But understanding the mood behind the message can go a long way to unlocking a richer, more expressive French.

And once you learn to read the mood, the subjunctive starts to feel like second nature.

Get your free guide to using the subjunctive here ...

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